That Sabotaging BITCH!

That Sabotaging BITCH!

I recently realized I was sabotaging myself. Actually, I wasn”t sabotaging myself – my subconscious-self was secretly sabotaging my conscious-self. I know, right? It sounds like something out of a Stephen King novel. It was THAT traumatic. Kind of like the moment you realize “redrum” was actually “murder” spelled backwards. TRAU.MAT.IC. (Make sure to enunciate the syllables and pause between each syllable. It makes it more You”ll find that my unconscious-self is also *overly* dramatic.)

So anyway, as part of my 2012 goals, I, or more specifically, my conscious-self, decided that I would run a marathon this year. I hired a personal trainer, Danielle Pellicano. (Read about my first session with Pellicano here. This post is VERY traumatizing, so be forewarned.)

My conscious-self did not bother to tell my subconscious-self that we were running a marathon. My conscious-self knew that it would only cause my subconscious-self to fear, to anger, to self-doubt, and most annoyingly of all – to whine. (My subconscious-self can be an incessant whiner.) So, conscious-self made a decision to ignore subconscious-self. And instead, conscious-self told everyone else instead. Conscious-self began running (figuratively) around town, telling everyone she knew:

I”m going to run a marathon this year!

She told her husband. She told her friends. She even told her neighbors – those that would listen. She announced it on FB! She TWEETED it. And she continued to ignore the subconscious-self – because she knew: the subconscious-self was lazy, and would find out too late to be able to change our mind.

The conscious-self thought she had won! She had been training with a personal trainer for 3 weeks – and although grueling, she was growing stronger. The whining and self-doubt were less and less present. Until one day, upon arriving for her personal training appointment with Pellicano, she realized:

I *!%*!ing. FORGOT. my running shoes.

That *bitch* – subconscious-self is sabotaging me!

At this very moment, conscious-self felt sick in the pit of her stomach. The heart they shared felt gripped, torn and caged. This is what panic and TRAU.MA. feel like. Things had been going along so well, when


A direct punch to the stomach, just when conscious-self least expected it.

What did Pellicano have to say to all this drama and trauma?

No Worries! You can go back home and pick them up. The gym will be here when you get back. 🙂

Drama. Trauma. – Gone in the span of 2 seconds. Talk about magic super powers!

And guess what? I haven”t seen that whiny sabotaging bitch since.

The thing about self-sabotage is – we all do it. We set goals. We dare to dream. And just when we”re taking a few steps casino online in the right direction, we sabotage ourselves. We put obstacles in our own way. We *forget* our running shoes. We spend all out time doing anything else because we”re “too busy” – when in actuality, we”re afraid we *might* fail. We”re afraid of a little discomfort. We”re outside our comfort zone. We whine. We whine. We whine some more. We think about all the reasons why NOT. We create unnecessary drama and trauma.

There are 3 wonderful things you should know about self-sabotage:

  1. YOU can stop it. Look for the signs that you are sabotaging your own goals – and STOP! DROP! ROLL! DO anything to stop that self-doubt dead in its tracks. And then – get back ONTO your one way street to success.
  2. A TRUE Friend/Genuine Cheerleader can stop your self-sabotage. Remember: “Drama. Trauma. Gone in the span of 2 seconds.” TRUE Friends and Genuine Cheerleaders who are on your side have that magic super power. Seek them out and make sure they know what your goals are. They”ll STOP you dead in your tracts the moment that self-sabotaging bitch shows up.
  3. YOU can be someone else”s TRUE Friend & Genuine Cheerleader! Don”t let them make excuses. – Help them get out of their own way! PS – do it with a smile!

That was last week. The week I “forgot” my running shoes. This week, I ran my first “long run” – 3 miles without any pain in my IT band. (Since September of last year, pain in my IT band had prevented me from running!) There”s no way I would have been able to accomplish that goal if I let a little self-sabotaging get in my way. (Thank you Danielle!) That”s a success even my subconscious-self can be happy about!

What’s your dream?

PS – Dream BIG!

-Daisy Nguyen

Dreamer. Writer. Creator.


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This week, I”m submitting to Yeah Write! – A group of great blogs. Come check us out, and on Thursday, March 15th, 2012, come back and vote for your three faves!


That Awkward Moment When You Realize You Have Back Fat

That Awkward Moment When You Realize You Have Back Fat

I recently experienced that awkward moment when you realize that you have BACK FAT. Yep – THAT awkward moment. It was BAD. REALLY REALLY BAD. I hope you never have THAT moment. Let me tell you about it.

It”s my first private training session with Danielle, who is an endurance training coach. That was YESTERDAY. She put me on the treadmill to assess my running style and gait – to see if anything I was doing is causing or contributing to my IT band issue. She video tapes my treadmill run from behind. She let”s me watch the video, and she points out various things to me. I can barely hear a darn thing, because the whole time, I”m thinking:

OMG. I have BACK FAT! When did THAT happen?

It was one of the most horrifying realizations I”ve had all year!

Perhaps I should start at the beginning and give you”all some background….

Last year, I had a secret goal: run a marathon. I didn”t tell anyone, but I just started running. At first it was excrutiating – there were moments I thought I might die, moments when I questioned my sanity, and still other moments where I questioned the sanity of the runners around me. But as I ran more often, and longer distances, I realized, I wasn”t going to die – and then one day, I magically got that runner”s high everyone talks about.


THIS is what I want to look like - lean, mean running machine with NO back fat!

THIS is what I want to look like - lean, mean running machine with NO back fat!

I had been bitten by the runner”s bug. I started looking for every opportunity to run. I”d run during my lunch hour, I”d run early in the morning before my day began. I sometimes snuck in a run on break – just around the block. I ran with my dog. I walked my dog. I ran to the local video store. I ran everywhere. I was up to running 5-6 days a week. The farthest distance I ran all in one shot? 10 miles. The day I ran THAT, I was beaming from ear to ear – my secret goal of running a marathon was within reach!

Then, one day, I started having pain in my IT band. That was last September.I stopped running long distances, and started picking up other physical activities. I never gave up on that secret goal.

This year, as part of my 2012 Goals, I decided, the game was ON. I had all winter to think about it. No more secrets. I was going to tell my friends. I was going to train. I was going to surround myself with other people doing the same thing, and I was going to do IT. And just as I cast that desire out to the world, my neighbor, Maria, sends me this message on Facebook: (Truly, an answer to my prayer!)

Ladies: Happy New Year! As many of you know I am turning 40 this year! I thought it would super fun to get a group of people together to do Potete giocare con la Jack Hammer in casino come casino pa natet GD, Unibet e Star Casino !La storia parla del detective privato Jack Hammer sulle tracce del temibile Evil Doctor Wuten per riuscire a catturarlo. a local Duathalon…The Event I picked is…..Iron Girl, Bloomington, MN SEPT 23rd 2012. The distance is short and sweet… 2 mile run, 22mile bike, 2 mile run. I did this event last year, it was a blast….it is an all woman event and is perfect if you are new to duathalons….PLEASE JOIN ME…and invite a friend.

Training….My Coach, Danielle Pellicano, has offered to coach us thru this race…she has been a tremendous asset to me…She coached me for my 1st 5K a few years ago, the TC 10 miler and the Iron Girl last year…

To kick off this event….Danielle and I are hosting a sign up party
FEB 11th, 10am-11am
Danielle”s Studio
4930 35th Street West
St. Louis Park, MN 55416

Please RSVP back to me if you are” in” for this event and are able to make the sign up party…

For more information 
check out

Hope to see you all very soon!

SCORE! All in one feel swoop, I had found a group of women who have similar goals, who will be supportive, and the perfect trainer. It”s funny how life works sometimes! When you know exactly what you want, and it”s your time to do it – all the pieces fall in place.

Since I had problems with my IT band, I knew I needed specialized help and training in order for me to be able to race. I signed up for some private training sessions with Danielle. OK, so NOW FAST FORWARD to my first private training session with Danielle. YESTERDAY. She put me on the treadmill to assess my running style and gait – to see if anything I was doing is causing or contributing to my IT band issue. She video tapes my treadmill run from behind. She let”s me watch the video, and she points out various useful tips to me, like how I swing my arms too much. I can barely hear a darn thing, because the whole time, I”m thinking::

OM MY GOD. I have BACK FAT! When did THAT happen?

So, now, I”m even more motivated than ever to train hard and run this race. Not only is it a goal for 2012. I have a back fat problem!

And yes, TODAY, I am sore in all the right places, but that only means I am one step closer to my dream of running in a marathon. I”m loving it!

What”s your dream?

PS – Dream BIG!

-Daisy Nguyen

Dreamer. Writer. Creator.